BirthGirlz are.....
Strong Women, Independent Thinkers, Renegades or Closet Rebels, Birth Junkies, "Surprise" Parents, Home Birthers, Hospital Birthers, and Super Mamas Everywhere!
BirthGirlz are busy......
Having babies, Raising families, Feeding people, Teaching, Learning, Organizing, Building community, Questioning everything, and Creating a revolution one birth at a time!
What's your name?
Jill Adrian Kay
Who's in your family?
Me, my husband Stefano and baby Luca!
Where do you live?
Boca Raton
Why do you want to be a BirthGirl?
Because a lot of women I have met don't seem to realize the importance of being educated about their birth options and choices. Many just think their care provider will handle it all, and they are often shocked when the doctor isn't standing by their bed for 12 hours holding their hand. Women need more information, more support, more choice and more maternity leave!!!!
What kind of prenatal care did you choose, why, and would you make the same choice again?
I saw an OB/GYN for the first few months of my pregnancy because I had previously had 4 ectopic pregnancies so I was highly monitored. Once everything was determined to be in the correct location, we wanted to switch to a midwife for a home birth, but each time we tried, something just didn't feel right or line up right and we ended up staying with my OB/GYN. She is TOTALLY awesome and saw me through all my ectopics so it was nice to be with her for this wonderful pregnancy as well. Next time around: midwife and home birth!
Where and how did you birth?
Short version: C-section in the hospital. Long version: I did my doula certification and assisted at three births while I was pregnant and couldn't wait to go through my own labor! I was so excited and so prepared. But as it happens, the universe had other plans...baby Luca was breech and despite weeks of chiropractic care, acupuncture, moxibustion, pool headstands, couch inversions, talking and music playing, and an external version attempt, he was not budging at all!! My doctor was not willing to do a vaginal breech birth, and I was not willing to change providers at the last minute so after some complete disbelief that I was not going to be able to labor, some sadness, and some research, I was happy with my decision to stick with a doctor I trusted and felt safe with. And I got her to wait until a day before my due date so that's a little something.
How is being a mama different than you thought it would be?
I had absolutely no clue how insanely amazing it would be. I don't know if it's the oxytocin still floating around the blood but I am infinitely in love with my baby boy and more so every minute.
What secret do you wish someone had told you before you were a mama?
If you breastfeed (and why wouldn't you!!) then life will be much easier if you bedshare!! And babies really teach you about "one day at a time" because every day is something different than the one before.
How do you think our culture views pregnancy, birth and motherhood?
Well not so good. I tend to be a little cynical and see the negatives but there is so much that needs to change. And maybe slowly it is changing. But we are still so unsupportive of mothers in our society--no paid maternity leave, little support for breastfeeding past a few months let alone 1, 2, 3 years plus. Still highly medicalized births despite all the studies showing the negative outcomes. And all the popular pregnancy books and websites just support the same old crap and don't give you the best info. So we could be doing a lot better. But I also feel we may be on the cusp of something. A little breastfeeding legislation is getting through to help mamas in the workplace, the number of doulas is on the rise, and the midwives are still standing strong!
Do you consider yourself an activist for causes you care about?
Yes to the max. I wrote my Master's thesis on the International Politics of Breastfeeding 12 years before I ever had kids. I spoke before Congress in support of breastfeeding legislation. I was the Political Director for my local Planned Parenthood. I've been to dozens of marches, written lots of letters, confronted restaurant managers on breastfeeding policies and visited my Congresspeople. It is so very important to right wrongs and work for justice.
Where do you work and do you get paid?
I work from home now so that I can raise my son. I work mostly when he is sleeping, and I would prefer not to have to do that but I have a great job that is very supportive and yes they pay me!
Do you feel supported in your choices about your family's lifestyle?
My mother and husband are huge supporters of my choices. (Do you really need anyone else? LOL) I'd like a more knowledgeable pediatrician. She keeps saying ridiculous things about breastfeeding and it's frustrating.
How do you want your children to think of you as a mama?
I'd like them to feel that I am kind and loving and patient and respectful. And I always want to be available for them and hope they will feel comfortable coming to me about anything.
What is the best thing anyone has ever done for you?
Gotten me pregnant! ;) Thank you to my husband for helping to bring such a wonderful gift to this world!
Bottles or breasts?
Hmmm, if you haven't figured it out by now...BREASTS!! Really, to me it's like the choice between a daily diet of McDonald's or one of organic fruits and veggies. Just do it!
What other question should we have asked you?
Are you on Facebook?
Yes, and I always enjoy meeting like-minded mamas! Friend me!
